THE URGENCY OF LOVE

“When someone offends you or lets you down, remember how short life is. Too short not to love, too short not to care. People who are unkind have forgotten this.” - Eknath Easwaran

“People who quarrel forget their lives will end soon. For those who remember, quarrels come to an end.” - Buddha

We all have superhuman strength when it comes to love.  Love is the capacity to see the needs of others and to act accordingly.  It is our birthright and our purpose.  But you gotta tap into it. 

If we each go our own way and disregard how our food, carbon and communication choices affect each other, we all lose. 

But if we change our perspective from private to united in heart, we unlock the vast potentialities of our highest ideals. 

That’s why I say love more, forgive more, hope more and have more faith.  Science tells us what’s possible, but it is faith in ourselves and faith in humanity that enables us to embody our highest ideals.    

Remove the Barriers Within Yourself

Learning to love is spiritual evolution and it’s the key to social progress.  Hinduism tells us that three formidable enemies stand in our way:  fear, anger and self-will.

Eknath Easwaran described the three in terms of ancient warfare.

“First there is the infantry, which is fear – all kinds of fears [ranging from doubt, insecurity, and anxiety to full-blown fears.]…We may not think we have much fear to reckon with, but it is as deep as our separateness, which cuts deep into the consciousness of every one of us.”

“Then there is the cavalry, which is anger……[This includes discontent, resentment, anger, and hostility.] [A] cavalry attack is much more ferocious than infantry and much more difficult to conquer.”

“But the real backbone of the army in ancient India was the elephant…[When invading armies from outside India] would look up and see huge armored elephants coming down on them by the hundreds, sometimes by the thousands, they would be panic-stricken.  The elephantry is self-will, and it is a thousand times more fierce than anger and fear.” 

Bhagavad Gita for Daily Living, Volume 2, Chapter 8, p 95-96. 

So below I provide a few timeless tactics to create more security (reduce fear), reduce anger, and lessen self-will.

Fear

Lao Tzu counsels us, “Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes.  Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow.  Let reality be reality.  Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” 

To develop such equanimity [composure and evenness of mind], I follow a meditation practice outlined by Eknath Easwaran. (Other modern illumined gurus include Paramahansa Yogananda, Will Tuttle, Supreme Master Ching Hai, and Thich Nhat Hanh.)

Give it a try. What you’ll find is that, to quote Swami Vivekananda, “True guidance is like a small torch in a dark forest. It doesn’t show everything at once. But gives enough light for the next step to be safe.”

Here’s another tip from Lao Tzu, “Kindness in words creates confidence.”  

Easwaran explains, “In most of our modern means of communication, we seem to have lost the desire for right speech.  Everywhere it is wrong speech that is practiced.  It is wrong speech that is taught, wrong speech that is written…[W]e can all cultivate in our own home, in our own personal relations, right speech:  clear, concise, very personal, and very compassionate.” 

He goes on to say, “My observation is [that] it is people who are insecure who get obstreperous [unkind and unruly] in communication…[And] discourtesy is the stamp of insecurity.  So the Buddha says, be courteous; it will make you secure.  Be more secure; it will make you more courteous.”

Anger

Anger in its purest form is passion.  When we burst out in anger, we harm others and ourselves.  But if we intelligently channel that passion for selfless work for others, we can use it effectively.

Gandhi said it best, “I have learned through bitter experience the one supreme lesson to conserve my anger, and as heat conserved is transmuted into energy, even so our anger controlled can be transmuted into a power which can move the world.”

My next tip, keep continuous respect for yourself and others.  It will not only stop you from condemning others (which is divisive and can lead to hatred), but also protect you from shame, guilt, and condescension.  As Swami Vivekananda would say:  “If there is a sin, this is the only sin; to say that you are weak or others are weak.”

Mahatma Gandhi once wrote: “Hate the sin and not the sinner.” Tough to do in practice. But if you keep your words constructive and conciliatory regarding terrible acts, then you will harness your passion for good.

Self-will

I believe our children’s ideals are the jewels of the Earth.  And, in the language of the Buddha, there is no greater social activist as the one who drives out egotism and restores the ideals of our youth. 

But most people identify with their ego, rather than their authentic Self (who is that consciousness within us who readily honors our highest ideals).  The mind is a thought and emotion factory and storehouse.  We are not the mind – nor are we the body.  Just as the body is what you eat, the mind fills up with what you read, listen to, and watch. 

In Hinduism, they say that you rise up by overcoming the destructive habit that holds you down.  I would mention this concept when I used to explain that food choice is the key to solving climate change.

But now I think avoiding most social media content is even more important.  The Buddha counsels us, “Our life is shaped by our mind.  We become what we think.”  When we focus on trivial social media content, our lives seem more trivial. When we focus on the negative through toxic social media, we become more negative, irritable and (eventually) more destructive. 

The problem is that negative people touting veganism drive people away by the hundreds. 

This is why we must learn to love. 

I carefully chose each and every one of the app videos after watching over 800 videos.  These app videos will help you understand the needs of the whole and to think and act accordingly.  And the Self Empowerment videos draw upon the great gurus of humanity to aid in the discovery of your authentic Self. 

Here’s my last tip to conquer self-will.  Watch the 36 minute video “Easwaran:  St. Francis’s Complete Guide to Becoming an Instrument of Peace” in the Self Empowerment video category of the App.  It outlines a practical way to convert self-will into pure love.